It was a “miserable hot summer day, which was the 14th miserable hot summer day in a row.” Samantha fanned herself as she trudged up 9th Avenue. A nasally Brit in a bikini top appeared out of nowhere. After a double cheek kiss hello, the Brit (played by former Spice Girl Gerri Halliwell) announced that she had just been swimming at the SoHo House. “I mean what else can you possible do in this heat except sit by the pool and drink cocktails while they midst you with Evian?” she asked.
The encounter got Samantha fired up, and she became fixated on getting her own membership at the SoHo house. She was put on “some bullshit waiting list,” and when she showed up in person to protest, the receptionist gave her the cold shoulder. She used the restroom to collect herself before leaving, and found that someone had left their membership card by the sink. She hatched a plan. She used the card, not only to relax by the pool with W Magazine, but to get Carrie, Miranda, and Charlotte in as well.
SoHo House (for those of you who have never taken my tour) is a real place in the Meatpacking District—a private, members-only hotel and club that features a spa and rooftop pool. The annual fee is $1,800 ($2,400 if you also want access to the London facility), and the application requires a short essay explaining “why you’d like to be a member” and a photograph. From my bus, you can see the glass panels that ring the roof, and in the summertime you can just make out people lounging poolside in white beach chairs.
I had my own private pool experience this past Saturday, not at SoHo house, but the Samoset Resort in Rockland, Maine (better known to my contemporaries as “that place where we had the senior prom.”)
My sister and I had planned a trip to Maine to visit our parents several months ago, and while discussing our itinerary with my mother via email, she suggested the following:
It is 2 degrees…I thought we could go lie in the sun and read trashy mags via Samoset poolside…
The “go lie in the sun” bit is a complete metaphor—the pool’s indoors and what my mother meant was simply that we could so someplace warm. She’d been talking this pool up for ages: “What else can you possibly do in this cold except sit by the pool? And there’s even free coffee!”
My sister and I agreed that anything to get us out of the house would be just fine. And so, on Saturday morning, my mother packed three back issues of People that she had stolen from work, my father dug out his orchid-patterned swimming shorts, and all four of us hopped in the car for the 45 minute drive through slush and freezing rain to get to the Samoset.
The parking lot was packed when we arrived, and we all wondered if my parent’s secret had gotten out. Would we be put on some bullshit waiting list too? In the lobby, we found the source of the crowd: the 38th Annual Maine Fisherman’s Forum, an expo devoted to all things seafood. They weren’t there for the pool.
“My wife and I come here sometimes to swim,” my father said at the reception desk.
The woman looked him up and down.
“Are you a guest?” she asked.
“No, but we’ve done it before,” he said. “You usually charge us twelve dollars.”
“It’s twenty dollars now if you’re not a guest.”
“What about for students?” my father asked, pointing at my sister and me. We both finished grad school last year.
“Twenty dollars,” she said.
“What about for seniors?” he said, indicating my mother and himself. They each have five years to go.
“Twenty dollars,” she said.
This bitch had it in for us! On the other hand, the towels were included, and (as my father kept repeating), there was shampoo and conditioner in the locker rooms. And so, he shelled out the entire eighty bucks, and the four of us lounged by the pool for two hours with a few other families, none of which had children over the age of seven.
Just like a day in the life of Carrie and friends. Almost.
Charlotte, Miranda, Carrie, and Samantha...Or should I say Dad, Sister, Me, and Mom?
Emily Sproch is a writer and a Sex and the City tour guide. Each Friday, she chronicles the fine line between reality and fiction in her column “Almost Carrie.”
May Levy,
Social Media Wiz
P.R. & SEM Strategy
(347) 559-8174
http://maylevy.com/ 
Lindsey Gentile is an actor, writer, comedienne, and all-around gal-about-town. Originally South Florida, she now lives in a small studio apartment in Hell's Kitchen with her dog, Oliver, who she adopted as a ploy to pick up men. Every Thursday, she reports from the front lines of single life in NYC. 
Born and raised in New York, Maria Gorshin is a frequent contributor to WestSideRag.com and UntappedCities.com. She delves into the secrets of New York architecture on the second Friday of every month in her column "Talking to the Walls." You can also check out her blog at CityGirlWrites.blogspot.com. 
Rooted in culture, education, lifestyle and entertainment, Desi has been inspired by the stories of children she’s met around the world. She’s taught and mentored children throughout NYC, Canada and Ecuador and has produced and co-authored several children’s musicals and story-book play adaptations. She is the creator and host of Women in the Making: Tomorrow's History Today©, a radio show on WBAI 99.5 FM highlighting the views, perspective, questions, goals and accomplishments of today's girl. WIM covers a full range of topics from images in the media, finances and school to healthy eating, careers and the role of girls and women in revolutions around the world. Desi also created What’s Cookin’ in the World, Miss Desi? © an arts-based international cooking program to address the bevy of health issues plaguing today’s youth, including childhood obesity. What’s Cookin’© explores culinary cultural landscapes and fosters in students new cultural experiences while “pushing” their palates, offering them options for healthy eating. Desi is currently exploring nutrition and the connection between food and wellness while apprenticing at Natural Gourmet Institute for Health & Culinary Arts. She holds an MBA in media management from Metropolitan College of New York and a BA in Communication from the University of Hartford. Desi sits on the board of award-winning Children’s Theatre Company in NYC and is a reporter for WBAI Radio in NYC and Rice N Peas magazine in London, where she’s written articles on the ever-changing ideals of beauty, health, music, hip-hop culture, politics and fame. 
Pi Douglass is a veteran of thirteen Broadway shows including: "Hello Dolly", "Purlie", "Jesus Christ Superstar", "The Wiz", "A Chorus Line", and "La Cages Aux Folles". He has done industrials and commercials for many leading businesses and traveled around Europe in the role of the lead singer, "the Cop", on a tour with the "Village People". In 2006, along with his writing partner, A. Wellington Perkins, Mr. Douglass produced "In Our Time", about the Gypsy Robe Awards, at Lincoln Center. The show was sponsored by Actors' Equity and the League of Women during black history month for the celebration of African Americans who had received the Gypsy Robe Award. Pi himself received the Gypsy Robe Award three times during his stage career. Some of his works as a playwright and author along with his writing partner, A. Wellington Perkins include: "Champagne, Fireworks, and Two Old Dolls", "Pride Day", and a TV series screenplay, "Striver’s Row". Mr. Douglass also wrote, produced, and performed in his own Off-Off-Broadway one-man-show, "A Slice of Pi". 
Poet, novelist, and gay activist, Perry Brass has published 15 books and been nominated for 6 Lambda Literary Awards. Originally from Savanah, Georgia, Perry has now called New York his since 1966. In 1969, he joined the Gay Liberation Front and became an editor at "Come Out!", the world’s first gay liberation newspaper. Check out his musings on love, sex, and intimacy in his column "The Wisdom of Desire" on the 25th of each month. 
A writer, producer and avid traveler, Janice McDonald has visited all 50 states, more than 70 countries and all seven continents. While based in Atlanta, you are more apt to find her on an island in the South pacific or hiking the Inca Trail in Peru. They know her by name at Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson Airport!
Having spent 20 years at CNN, she continued her traveling escapades when she went out on her own and started her company J-Mac Productions. She works regularly with a host of networks in the area of field production and writing. Shows she has produced include Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern and International Open House with the Travel Channel.
Janice’s articles have appeared in newspapers and magazines across the globe. She is also the author of Historic Walking Guides: Bruges, The Insider’s Guide to Atlanta, The Insider’s Guide to Myrtle Beach and the Grand Strand, The Myrtle Beach Pavilion and the soon to be published Aiken. 
Raised a Millenarianist, Villagemon has lived through many apocolyptic periods. He finds himself commenting more on politics than he ever intended, but he's a sucker for every new season of political hope. A Greenwich Village New Yorker since he learned to shlep and kvetch in 1982, he still remains attuned to those west of the river through frequent bicycle trips. His AANY column is a small step toward being a solid citizen and finding true north. 
Tamara Morgan is an art therapist and social worker in the South Bronx and a graduate of NYU’s Steinhardt School for Art Therapy. Diagnosed at birth with osteogenesis imperfecta, a condition that makes her bones abnormally fragile, Tamara writes about conquering the NYC as an individual with a disability. She lives in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. 
Emily Sproch is a writer and a "Sex and the City" tour guide. Each Friday, she chronicles the fine line between reality and fiction in her column "Almost Carrie." She has lived in New York for over ten years—most recently in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn—with her husband Nick. 
Andrew Bell is a board member of VFP.org, correspondent and producer for WBAI.org 99.5FM, chapter organizer for the bigapplecoffeeparty.org, progressive political campaign operative, model, actor and former dancer who enjoys writing about his insights, observations and meditations gained while maintaining a Spiritual presence in the core of the Big Apple. Andrew is a resident of Manhattan. 
Thomas Pryor's work has appeared in The New York Times, Mr. Beller's Neighborhood, A Prairie Home Companion, New York Press, Underground Voices Magazine, Opium Magazine Online, Our Town, The West Side Spirit and Ducts. Thomas curates a monthly storytelling show at Cornelia Street Café on the second Tuesday of the month. His story, "Madame Butterfly Goes Down", is part of Thomas Beller's anthology, "Lost and Found: Stories from New York." His blog: "Yorkville: Stoops to Nuts," is listed in the City Room Blog Roll of The New York Times and his weekly radio show was featured on the Centanni Broadcasting Network. Two of his stories were published in “Mickey Mantle ~ Memories and Memorabilia” by Larry Canale. His newspaper column runs in Our Town and The West Side Spirit. Thomas appeared on PBS's acclaimed nostalgic TV series: "Baseball: A New York Love Story," and he was featured on public radio’s “This American Life.” Thomas is a regular contributor to NearSay.com and Askanewyorker.com. He has written his first book, "Yorkville: Stoops to Nuts." 
Addie Morfoot covers the film industry as a freelance journalist for "Daily Variety" and is finishing her MFA in Creative Writing at The New School. Last year, her world turned upside when she gave birth to her son, Harry. Catch up with Addie each Monday as she writes about juggling work, school, marriage, and motherhood in the Big Apple. 
Check out the AANY staff's musings on city life, pop culture, politics, and more. 
Kelly Rush is the Field Liaison for the Alliance for Downtown New York, the Business Improvement District (BID) for Lower Manhattan. Every other Thursday, she writes about what's up downtown and provides info on everything from where to find great corned beef to where to find great parking. Kelly received her MFA in Creative Writing at The New School and lives in South Slope, Brooklyn with her cat Bluey. 