The Dress

I got married in a BCBGMAXAZRIA party dress that I ordered online from Nordstrom’s for $288.  Because my dress budget was low, my shoe budget was high.  Until that point, the most expensive shoes I’d ever purchased were a pair of Steven by Steve Madden satin paisley d’Orsay pumps for $89.99, which I adored and wore into oblivion.  They made my ankles (something that everyone who knows me will tell you I am sensitive about) look—if not exactly slim—than at least slimmer.  For my wedding shoes, I wanted to splurge in a way I never had before.  I wanted the label to say one of three things: Louboutin,  Valentino, or Blahnik.  Not even Choo would do.

I also wanted the shoes to be blue, a remarkable coincidence considering the plot of the first film.  I don’t recall SATC: The Movie crossing my mind at the time, but in retrospect it seems suspicious.  Despite how much I disliked SATC1, those blue shoes must have gotten lodged in my subconscious.

My price cap was $700, and I spent months scouring websites and stores.  I learned two things immediately: 1) I couldn’t afford Valentinos and 2) I couldn’t fit in Louboutins.  The Valentinos that I liked, though exquisite, were over $800.  As for the Louboutins, every time I donned a pair it conjured this mental image of trying to squeeze my foot into one of those plastic corn-on-the-cob dishes from the 99¢ store.  I am only a size seven, but those Louboutins are narrow.

The Shoes

The Blahniks were the only way to go, and I must say that after immersing myself in luxury shoes, the Blahniks actually started to seem affordable.  The leather d’Orsay pumps were all $650, and they even had the blue that I wanted.  It wasn’t a deep royal blue like Carrie’s shoes in the film, but a bright, spring-like blue for my bright, springtime wedding.  They were the exact same style as those $89.99 Steve Madden’s, the most flattering cut for my insecurity.  With tax, they cost $725.00.  Both my mother and my soon-to-be mother-in-law were there when I bought them, two women as different as Steve’s Ma and Bunny MacDougal.  When my own mother asked about the total, I told her she’d be better off not knowing.  My mother-in-law, on the other hand, suggested I pick up a second pair.

I loved my wedding outfit.  I liked the shoes very much, but I adored them paired with the dress.  The whole ensemble made me feel fresh and light and fun, and it conveyed the exact vibe I wanted to create for the wedding itself.  In the end, we succeeded with the vibe.  The only problem was that a half an hour into the reception, one of my Manolos broke in two.

To be fair, it wasn’t entirely the shoe’s fault.  My wedding was on a rooftop in midtown, and the flooring was made from that same spongy material they put on high school tracks to help support your knees.  My sister’s best friend also snapped a heel (albeit a less expensive one), plus I was very excited and jumping about in a way that was probably not good for fancy shoes.  Still, one can’t help but think $725 dollars and they broke?

Like any good SATC guide, I had packed flip flops, and the truth was that I ready to change into them anyway.  But two weeks later, after regrouping and rejoining society, I boxed up my wedding Manolos and took them back to Barney’s where I was told that I wasn’t eligible for a refund, but that I would receive store credit.

Here’s the thing: walking around with $725 worth of store credit to Barney’s in your wallet is stressful.  When should you spend it?  How should you spend it?  Should you get more shoes?  Should you buy a fabulous coat?  Should you get two sale items that you kind of love or one full price item that you really love?  I got so tired of thinking about it that one day after work I went in and refused to leave until I spent the whole damn thing.  I decided to stick with shoes (there are no coats at Barney’s for $725, who was I kidding?).  I wanted basic black, something I could wear with anything for the rest of my life.  I went straight for the Manolos again, knowing that at least they would fit.  I found a pair that were different than anything I’d worn before.  They had a strap that crossed diagonally over the bridge of my foot, a look I didn’t think I could pull off, but they looked decent.  They were $200 more than what I had in credit, but with a wild desperation I plunked down the extra money just so I could finally put the whole issue to bed.

I have worn the black Manolos with the diagonal straps several times, and I’m sure I’ll wear them again, but the truth is I don’t love them.  Remember the skinny mirrors at Barney’s that tricked Elaine into thinking she looked great in that terrible black dress on Seinfeld?  They must have those same mirrors in the shoe department because out in the cold light of day those friggin’ diagonal straps make my ankles look huge.

The Outfit (right before the shoes broke)

The Outfit (after the shoes broke plus a few drinks)

Emily Sproch is a writer and a “Sex and the City” tour guide.  Each Friday, she chronicles the fine line between reality and fiction in her column “Almost Carrie.”